The alliteration in the title was a happy mistake.
LA is a grand town.
There’s always something to do or some new place to eat. When I moved here I, admittedly, was attracted by the dream. The possibilities. The adventure.
What can I say? I’m a glutton for adventure.
For the most part, its lived up to the image I painted in my mind. I do always find new places for ice cream and ramen, and there’s no shortage of museums to poke around on the weekends. I hit the beach or the mountains on my random whims, and feel like I can always find some sort of adventure to fill my afternoons.
But as an [extroverted] introvert, I’ve felt the struggle as well. The isolation in LA is real. My friends are all scattered throughout the metropolitan area and getting together with anyone takes a full commitment, hopping different highways, and clearing a whole day to account for traffic coming and going. It really can feel like you are on an island alone sometimes.
This isolation over these past few years made it tough for me to feel like this is home and truly find my place here. I’ve been reflecting lately and realized that I’ve made some decisions these past few years – both personal and professional- that Past Nikita would kick me for making. Although, on the bright side, its probably a part of my evolution into my future self, so there’s always that.
I wanted to jot a few of the lessons down, with hopes they may be a nice little reminder for someone:
- You are allowed to start again. Again. Only you get to decide how many times you want or need to start over or change your mind about the path you are walking. Its your path.
- Knowing your worth doesn’t make you “conceited” or “picky” You don’t have to put up with anything [or anyone] that is killing your spirit.
- You don’t have to stay quiet to help someone else stay comfortable You have a voice and its meant to be used. Don’t avoid conversations just to make others happy or to “keep the peace.”
- Yours is the only opinion worth your attention What others think about your life, choices, beliefs and whatever else are theirs to deal with and change. Not yours.
- If someone tries to push you out of their life, let them I know in the moment its not really that simple, but it really is That. Simple.
- You are enough Its not your job to convince anyone else of your worth. Its your job to be you, the right people will see the value in that.
I hope these little reminders help you along the way. Reminding myself daily has certainly helped me and given me a strength and resolve that I forgot I have. LA is an amazing town, but if you aren’t from here, surviving means having (or quickly gaining) a certain level of inner strength. You have to be your own biggest advocate.
I’ve learned plenty more lessons over the past few years, but they aren’t all as easy to articulate. Everyday, just like everyone else, I learn something new about myself, do something to impress myself, or make a decision that I want to kick myself over. Its all part of my evolution.